TRAPPED again!!

DID you ever feel like you wanted to “throat punch” someone when they talk or “babble” meaningless bullshit? Their voices sound like they are talking against a “fan blade” turning warp speed! Did you ever feel like The Lone Ranger riding into the sunset after you saved some “damsel” from a runaway wagon with 2 barrels of water on it? Do you feel TRAPPED again as you lay in the grass looking up at the clouds drifting across the sky?

Do you? Do you?

As I sit on a beanbag here today eating “Cheerios” out of it’s box on the floor, my brain, is at warp speed processing the news of the new wave of COVID-19 that seems to be creeping across the territory.

I close my eyes, swallow my cheerios, and wonder! I dream, I see people, big people, little people, kids, adults, old farts and mama’s, little puppy dogs following behind. Some had backpacks on, some were fast walking, most did not look up or from side-to-side. They seemed lost, out of their “nest” as they quickly avoided each other. You could not see if they had a smile on their face. Their eyes had a different look than before.

Again, I fell into the TRAP, the dream seemed so real…I can feel my pulse increase, my anger well’s up, I RIPPED the MASK off my face so I could breathe, talk and smile. These simple pleasures can and do disappear so fast and leave you helpless.

YOU know what? I was the slayer of that ancient TIGER chasing me! I took charge, I had the chance and option of moving out of state. I did it in order to survive with my freedoms I lost. I moved back to where I grew up. Old friends became new friends again. I was closer to family. I fit right in to a new “tribe”. I can sit next to a stranger and eat an Outlaw Cheeseburger and drink a Bud Light. I can watch “cows” being auctioned off on a bar TV…YOU read that right! You can choose noon food specials each day of the week and it’s good! Friday night’s menu leaves your belly full, as folks come from near and far to enjoy not only the social “tribe” but also the good food.

Stress, fear, anxiety and cabin fever seem not to exist. There is a “balance” of old and new. I go to church each Sunday to strengthen my faith in the good Lord. After church a bunch of us go to the Schoolhouse Cafe for Sunday bunch…they always have mashed potatoes and gravy, 2 kinds of meat, veggie, coffee, Jell-O and sweet salads! Most often, on the way there my uncle and I cruise the countryside on the way, looking at crops, used trucks and their prices, cattle in the hay fields. We find our talk to be good and cheap, local and national. We have opinions. We do not have to think about “throat punching” each other, or others we talk to!

Amazing huh!!

The morning sunrises and sunsets are a beauty to behold. A camera does not do justice to what the human eye sees! The small town grocery store shopping parking lot does not feel like a freeway of life, the grocery store lanes have a 1 mph speed limit so you have time to say “hi” and “talk” to folks. Their is toilet paper on the shelf, a candy table with 10 for $10 stuff on it, sweet tooth haven!

I packed a “BACKPACK” of this new life. I took charge. I throat punched that “old” new normal past, turned by back to the mouthy bullshit of seemly garbage and opinions. I made even better lifestyle changes! I packed up my Mini Cooper with 3 pair of Levi’s, a lot of T’s, a couple dress shirts, and my Levi jacket. I headed straight to the Old West where gunslingers pack a rifle in their pickup, cowboys go after range cattle on horses, wild horses do exist and of course, maybe, I can find the love of my life!

I more than realize that not all people can move, but as I, I realize that you and I can control how our response becomes our reaction to life situations. MOSTLY, we can “throat punch” our reactions to keep our own “balance”. I know it helps me through the fear, stress and anxiety. I can hug a lady, a friend, shake a hand, talk to my brother or sister and even run through the house “naked” with the window shades up so I can start a rumor! That can put a smile on your face…it is the simple things I do that can calm the “inner circle” of my soul. The MAD fades away!

What do you think? Can you do this? so what if you slip and slide, life is not perfect. You can get “cold” in the winter running around naked in your house, besides my coffee gets cold too! The glass of milk gets warm sitting on the counter. The dishwater bubbles pop. At least I am not chained to my recliner…I can balance life…I DO IT!

Stay in the present, the past is past, the future is just that, the future! I still practice safe finger washing, wear a mask when I have to, take it off when I can. REMEMBER, you are in control!!!!!

Thought for the day: “BACKPACK IT”

Later John